All posts tagged: Gay Power

Fear

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As I laid down beside you, I let every bit of air leave my lungs You were everything I thought you were, and I must let you go You covered me with an anointed oil that has no antidote the residue is something I have come to accept I outlined your silhouette, with my hand  I touched my heart as if it was a tangible object to stroke and console At times your presence has provoked my inner child moreover, you have reminded me of my pure humanness please let me lay beside you, so I can stare into your reflection I promise I won’t need you forever  Only tonight, when I need to hear you breathe when I awaken, I know you will be gone as the first blinding ray of sunlight enters my room I will know, you have let me go Carl Meadows April 14, 2016

Don’t Count Me Out

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As I crawled from my childhood battlefield, I remembered the voices of hope, like a permanent etching in my mind I was never good enough, strong enough, quiet enough every time I had “an idea”, it caused the stone figures to shudder The forces of conformity weighted on me like a hundred bricks The passcode was easy to remember; “do what we say, not what we do” At times I felt the aloneness, as if I was taking the last possible drop of water yet, through hope, I always believed another tear would quench me And then the test began, like a lightning storm in a forgotten dessert You were there to feel the bolt You may have scarred me, torn at my skin and even made me weep  But you will never change the fabric of me My power isn’t one of dominance, ego or dishonesty  It is the most frightening one of all As I touch the hearts of those who know me through kindness, you will never know love, peace or redemption  …

Poem: The illusion of masculinity

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The illusion of masculinity Surfacing from the ashes, my stubble and mustache appeared Once a secret only known to me, I could now become whole and complete as I showed my masculine prowess Sculpted with muscles and a scent of musk, my hunger gripped me like a mirage; eating through the eyes of lust was an ultimate betrayal The power I felt knowing I was wanted, superseded the wisdom it took to be a man All I could do was imagine the possibility of shaking the male world into submission The ultimate image of power and confidence a few feet in front of me I reached into my leather sack and pulled out the most threatening weapon of all I placed them on my feet and walked amongst the crowds My masculinity caused a severe vulnerability amongst men The heals would threaten the most iconic images of manhood As I lifted my head amongst such fascination and distain, I rose above them all; I turned my head and walked into the future The illusion of masculinity …